I think it’s really good that you’re able to understand this about yourself. Many people find it hard to understand why or what causes them to feel and behave in a certain way, so it’s always good to try to reflect upon ourselves and learn more about who we are as inidividuals. You seem to have a good skill of reflecting on your own relationships with people, which is a good start if you want to change anything in yourself. Acknowledging the strengths and weaknessess that we have is also very useful, and I think it’s good that you’re open to new thoughts and trying to change.
Your willingness to adapt alone is a very powerful tool for a big change to come, and I just wanted to emphasize that what you’re thinking and trying to do is setting you on a right path. You’ll get to where you want to be soon, as long as you keep doing what you can. This is good effort, and more than some could make.
One of the things that has worked for me when I wanted to make a change in a relationship is to mute my doubts, and take a leap of faith by being honest with someone and telling them something that I’ve wanted to but couldn’t bring myself to say before. It wasn’t easy, and it definitely pushed me out of my comfort zone, but after I did it I was glad. Now I have better confidence in speaking my mind with others, and having a more open relationship. It’s okay to have boundaries in a relationship (in fact it’s important to have limits to every relationship), as long as you’re comfortable with them. If you’re happy, then that’s that.
I hope this helps!