Reply To: Trust

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Hi Aladdin,

As you say, it can be comforting to share thoughts and feelings with strangers in a forum such as supportseekers.  Sometimes we can be hyper-sensitive or take feedback the wrong way when we expose vulnerable emotions to people we know, but that doesn’t happen here, where we can accept opinions without feeling judged.

Having secure relationships with a few trusted people is a “protective factor”. Protective factors help us stay resilient when faced with difficult phases of life. Other protective factors include things like financial resources, activities that give us purpose and meaning in life, spiritual connection, and even having a pet can increase your ability to cope with life problems.

Leaning on those trusted good friends and family members, when needed, has psychological benefit for you. But keep in mind that life is full of change, people change and situations change. Your “circle of influence” will most likely change over the years as some drift out of that circle and others enter it. Part of resiliency is to be able to adapt to the processes of change in life. Adapting means being flexible with your expectations. Your initial post mentioned you tend to stay distant from people. Is it possible you have unrealistically high expectations of people, and it’s safer to stay distant so you don’t get disappointed by them?   Can you ever really know anyone as well as you know yourself? Is this perhaps a high expectation?