I appreciate your response. My daily effort to make human connections is exhausting and disheartening. I do work, I work with a mental health agency helping others to find hope. I have expressed my concerns to my remaining family members but cannot count on them to come looking for me should I disappear for a week or two. I have worked incredibly hard to develop a few friendships over the past few years, very kind people, but again, we go months without talking.
I realize this is just what happens to introverts who live alone. You die, you decompose until someone misses you and is willing to put the energy into looking. I don’t mean that in a self pitying way, just pragmatic. It just makes me sad some days.
Again, thanks for taking the time to read and respond. Maybe that’s all I needed, to know I’m not 100% alone in this moment.